Truth is different

Truth is different March 29, 2010 at 11:54 AM We have lost the tradi­tional art of storytelling. We do not have much time for our family. We do not have time to watch national news or read. But somehow we have a lot of time for gossip and for assassinating the characters of others. Indeed we do! Who does not know about the Loose Character girls? If a girl sleeps around with six boyfriends in six years, she becomes a "Sure Goti", someone you can just pick up after a party or a call. But trust me, do your home work before you begin your ex­ercise. Speaking through experience! I had heard her name everywhere, so much so that it appeared as if she had slept with everyone in Thimphu. Some spoke about how violently she made love, while oth­ers made fun of the foul odour emanating from her. I had not seen her at all, but I had a picture of her in my mind painted from the scores of short narratives people told me about her. To me she was an "emergency", substance abuser and a harlot. "She may have AIDs"; someone even told me that. And how did I meet her? A close friend of hers introduced me to her and even told me "You can take her to­night". "Where to"? I asked. "Anywhere", he replied. At first I could not speak to her, for I carried the image of a girl who sold herself for pleasure and not because of pov­erty. A man like me does not speak to a girl like her. "Au, do you have a match", she asked me. Knowing that I cannot contact HIV/AIDs by sharing match boxes, I gave her one. My friend (her friend) had disap­peared as we were light­ing a cigarette. "Are you working" She asked me. "Yes. I am married, I have a child……..", I told her everything as I was scared that she may jump on me. "Can we go for a drive" was her next question. "Here she comes. Oh God! I do not even have a cap. What if she accuses me of rape. What if all the people who told me stories about her saw me with her………" I was so wor­ried that I did not realize her asking me to stop the car. "I am getting off here. Thank you" she told me and left. From my rear window I saw her go­ing with an Indian who was waiting. "How much might she be getting" I thought to myself. I arrived home but could not sleep. Images of her disturbed me. She is pretty, she is not poor, so why is she what she is? Could I make a dif­ference by advising her? Just think about her par­ents, innocent souls who do not know what their girl is up to! Next day I went to town for a haircut and I saw her with a friend (girl). I did not want them to see me but they had seen me. "This is the guy who gave me a lift yesterday" she introduced me to her, in my dialect. I was surprised that she knew my dialect. Her friend received a call and she left. I was with her and I did not know what to do. "Want a coffee" she asked me. I forgot my hair cut and followed her. Inside the restaurant, she started to smoke and asked how my daughter was. She showed me a picture of her niece on her mobile and said that her job was babysitting, when her sister went to work. "Unemployed! So she must be doing it for money" I thought. "What's the problem" You are so quiet, she asked. I did not know what happened but the words came out "How much do you charge for a night"? I saw how angry she was as she walked away. Did I do anything wrong, no! But still I wanted to apologize and followed her. "I have a lot to say. Can we go for a ride" I asked her and she jumped in. We went to Buddha point and there I told her ev­erything; about what her friend's and others said about her. She did not cry, but she was hurt. "I have slept with 7 men so far. But all of them were my boy friends; and see what people make of me" she said. "It is al­ways like this" I consoled her. Since then I went to her house, met her mother and family. I now know that she is not what people had painted her as. But how do I tell others. They will laugh at me. "Never mind! She is my project now; I will show and tell oth­ers that she is not what they make her to be". I decided! And I am doing this. I told her also about it and have told her that without her cooperation I will not succeed. She will need to change her habits etc. Sometimes I ask my­self; "Why am I doing this". My subconscious answers "If you can make one life, one person happier, you are accu­mulating a lot of merits. And in cases like this you are teaching society not to take everything they hear as truth". And what if she was your sister? Ugyen Chubachu